You know you’ve seen them – those women who seem to have it all together. They are healthy, fit, smart, organized, and energetic. They seem to have this glow about them and are always positive. Everything in their life seems to be in place. It always looks as life comes easy to them.
Don’t be fooled! Despite the glow and “everything is great” mentality, they are going through chaos in life – job loss, financial loss, moves, divorce. But their bodies, weight and wellness are not suffering. They are able to thrive and experience positive progress and results in their wellness, energy, mood, weight, and other areas of their health.
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It seems that most of these “perfect” women that have it all together, have one thing in common – they made self-care a priority. This meant that they took time out for things like fitness, nutrition, meditation, quality time with friends/family, and personal growth.
For most of us, life is hard work. We give everything we have – physically mentally, and emotionally to most everyone around us. It’s like life is a sport and it requires so much of us – strength, endurance, agility, balance, and flexibility. Every day we have to be ON. But unlike real sporting events, there are no time-outs or off-seasons!
The truth is, life will always be stressful. And women take on more stress than men can even imagine – holidays, birthdays, events, etc. We make sure everything is perfect – the environment, the food, the decor, etc. It’s no wonder that so many of us are feeling frazzled and fatigued.
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We all have to make tough decisions when it comes to balancing life and career. We all want a rich and juicy life. When we give it our all in one area, we feel depleted and burnt out at the end of that push. I hear it all the time – clients, family, and friends tell me they just want to live a balanced life. And I’ve come to the conclusion that I don’t believe in life balance.
What I do believe in is BALANCING.
Our attention is constantly being pulled in a gazillion directions at once and that’s an increasingly common feature of modern life. The time we spent using technology has to come from somewhere – maybe time you would have spent with family, attended your child’s game, or maybe you chose to skip the gym.
The key to balancing is knowing what your priorities are and having boundaries.
Your priorities can shift from time to time depending on what’s going on in your life. If you’re slammed at work and need to put in some overtime to complete a project, that might mean you miss some family time. When the work project is over, then you are able to shift priorities back to your family. It might mean saying no to a girl’s night out because you have other things that are a priority. But maybe you haven’t had any “you” time in a while…then you need to say yes to a night out with friends!
Life doesn’t have to even out. If you think that, then you are fighting a losing battle because it’s never going to be equal in all areas. The good news is that no one is keeping score! And knowing that important tidbit takes most of the pressure off.
Whatever is important for you at this time, focus on that. I think when we focus on everything – all of the aspects of our life that are not a priority, that’s when we begin to feel out of balance and stressed. Put your energy to what is important today. And make that time in that particular activity count.
We’re all busy and sometimes we fill our days with “busyness” to numb ourselves from the stress of it all. Our days are filled with responsibilities, to-do’s, work, making lunches, cleaning the bathroom, and so much more. Day-in and day-out we cram so much into our days that we feel stressed, overwhelmed, and burnt out. We lack self-care and it’s ingrained in us that taking care of ourselves is ‘selfish’ and should only be done when everything else is complete. But when does that happen? Never!
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I think the key is in knowing yourself. Knowing how your unique body works. Knowing what your unique situation needs, and continuously pivoting to keep things in order.
I like structure, in fact I feel most calm when I know what to expect. But I remain flexible so I can dance with the ebb and flow of life.
I used to daydream about being a stay-at-home or work-from-home mom. But let me tell you, the responsibilities do not change. The laundry still has to be done, the dishes still pile up in the sink, and I still have to help with homework every night. I just have to manage my schedule much, much differently to get it all done. Again, I call it dancing with life.
So these days, now that I’ve changed how I think about balance and knowing that taking care of myself has to be priority, I somewhat cringe when people say how they just need balance in their life. I understand the idea of wanting it, but when is the last time you truly had it?
When I give myself some “me” time or focus on what is important now, that’s when I feel my days go smoother and things seem to fall into place.
What keeps you feeling like life is in balance? Do you dance with life?
Stories from around the web
How to ask about work-life balance in a job interview – 9NEWS.com
How to ask about work-life balance in a job interview – 9NEWS.com DENVER BUSINESS JOURNAL – When you are being interviewed for a new position, you want to learn about the company’s culture and get a sense of what it’s like to work there. You want the job to fit in with the rest of your life. But the single-worst …
The Optimal Work-Life Balance — ‘How to Gain the Perfect Ratio’ – Huffington Post
The Optimal Work-Life Balance — ‘How to Gain the Perfect Ratio’ – Huffington Post Work and life can simultaneously be balanced when we prioritize our goals and simplify everything. Anything in life is possible and some tasks are easier to manage than others. Having a work/life balance becomes increasingly harder and harder to find …
Think Tank: a work-life balance agenda – FM World
Think Tank: a work-life balance agenda – FM World So, we ask: how much do you, as FMs, think work-life balance is an agenda item in your organisation? To what extent is the attainment of a healthy work-life balance an overtly recognised issue? To what extent is work-life balance being affected by …
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